Digital Displacement
by Malcolm Fox
Summary: When Vanellope gets herself trapped in the Sugar Rush memory card slot, she is taken to the world of home console gaming. Now Ralph, Felix, and Calhoun must embark on a journey through the Internet to find Vanellope and bring her back home. Meanwhile, Litwak's arcade is in danger of closing and it's up to a young man to come up with a way to save the arcade. *on hiatus*!
1. Unexpected Deportation

**Digital Displacement**

_Disclaimer: The following is a non-profit fanfiction based on the movie Wreck-It Ralph. Wreck-It Ralph, Fix-It Felix Jr, Sgt. Calhoun, Vanellope Von Schweetz, Sugar Rush, Hero's Duty, and the characters within those games are all owned by Disney. All game characters not created by me are the properties of their respective companies. All products based on the characters I did create are property of their respective companies.  
_

**Chapter 1: Unexpected Deportation_  
_**

It all began on a Saturday afternoon when a young man in his mid 20s with short black hair, a black Pac-Man T-shirt, blue jeans, and black chuck taylors named Joe walked into the arcade. He had been a regular since 1993 as a 7 year old boy who would come on weekends and birthdays with his mom. You could say he was Litwak's best customer. He had played every game in the arcade, from Arkanoid to Zoo Keeper. Or at least the machines that had been around since 1993. A lot of them he liked, a few of them he didn't. If he had to choose one game he loved most, it would be Fix-It Felix Jr. He always loved the game for it's simple charm ever since he first played it in 1993(Yes, the game was released in 1982 but he wasn't born then). Though he liked Felix enough, his favorite character in the game was always Wreck-It Ralph. He always thought he was a misunderstood villain who was just angry for losing his home, but most people would just say that he was over thinking things. After all, it was only a video game.

The first thing Joe noticed was that not too many people were in the arcade today. There were a couple of high school students playing the Mortal Kombat II cabinet, those two boys that would hog the Sugar Rush machine, the "Moppet girl", Jennifer with the pink glasses, and maybe two or three other kids.

"Morning Joe," said Mr. Litwak.

"Hey, Mr. Litwak," said Joe, "Why's the place a ghost town today?"

"Didn't you hear?" asked Mr. Litwak, "That newfangled gaming console, the Gamestation 3000, just came out today. Everyone's gone over to GameShop to buy one."

"Gamestation 3000 already?" sighed Joe, "Game consoles are nice and all, but if you ask me, nothing beats going to a good old fashioned arcade to hang with some friends."

"That's something considering you own quite a few consoles yourself," said Litwak, "Too bad more of my customers aren't like you."

As Joe looked around, he sees that the boys over at the Sugar Rush machine had finally used up their last quarters and the machine was free.

"Yes!" Joe said to himself as he fist pumped into the air and walked over to the machine.

He took a moment to examine the machine and the first thing that always caught his eye was that there was a GameCube memory card slot. Not many people know it, but there were two different versions of Sugar Rush: the original 1997 version and the 2003 re-release that ran on the Triforce arcade board. You see, when the original first came out, despite being a good game in it's own right, people were disappointed by how the graphics didn't match those seen on the commercials so TobiKomi(in a deal with Nintendo, Sega, and Namco) re-released the game in 2003 with improved graphics and GameCube connectivity that allowed you to play with exclusive racers from the GameCube version and unlock characters and tracks from the arcade version. From the looks of the cabinet, it seems that it keeps the original game's artwork leading Joe to always suspect that the machine may have been upgraded from the inside. He shrugged, placed a GameCube memory card he had been holding in his pocket that he was planning to use for F-Zero AX and inserted his quarters...

Meanwhile inside the game "Fix It Felix Jr", the characters were going through the "attract mode". Unfortunately, they haven't attracted a customer in over 3 hours. The Nicelanders did the usual "toss the villain off the roof and into the mud routine". Ralph was pretty used to it by now, though, but it seemed that he had to do it about 45 times already in the past 3 hours.

"You okay, buddy?" asked Felix as he helped Ralph from the mud.

"Yeah, but it's really starting to wear thin when it happens 45 times in 3 hours," said Ralph.

"It's only just part of the program," said Felix.

"I know, I know," said Ralph as he wiped the mud from his clothing, "Felix, listen... since the arcade is pretty slow today, I was thinking that we could head over to Sugar Rush and watch Vanellope race."

"Whoa whoa whoa," said Felix, "The arcade is still open. What if somebody wants to play the game?"

"From what I could see out there, there are 8 people in the arcade. Those two high schoolers will be on the Mortal Kombat machine for hours, the elementary school kids just started the first quarter on a game of NBA Jam, that girl with the glasses is playing Pac-Man, and Joe is gonna play Sugar Rush."

"Joe usually likes to play this game, though," warned Felix, "It's his favorite, after all."

"No problem," said Ralph, "We go now, when can watch while he's playing and then get back to Fix-It Felix Jr after he finishes."

"Okay, I guess," said Felix reluctantly.

And with that, Felix and Ralph head on over to their train and make their way to Game Central. Ralph heads over to Sugar Rush while Felix goes on over to Hero's Duty.

"I'll meet you in the game," said Felix, "I just have to go get the Mrs..."

Ralph smiled, and waved back to Felix as he headed over to Sugar Rush.

_"That lucky son of a gun,"_ thought Ralph to himself, _"Yeah, Calhoun is tough as nails and little rough around the edges but it sure must feel nice to be able to have that special someone in your life..." _

Back in the arcade, Joe finished pumping his quarters into the Sugar Rush machine and pressed the start button.

"Please be there... Please be there..." said Joe to himself as he was looking at the character roster screen.

Joe never liked the "New Racers Daily" mechanic, especially if he would end up with mostly racers he didn't like(ESPECIALLY if it was King Candy. He was so sick of always having to race against that guy). Why they couldn't just have all the racers available, he'll never know. He just wanted to make sure one certain racer was there.

"Yes! There she is! Vanellope Von Schweetz!" said Joe excitedly.

"Cool, is it alright if I play with you?" asked Jennifer the "Moppet girl" as she spoke from behind him apparently having finished her game of Pac-Man.

"Sorry, I need to do a single player race," said Joe, "I just need to beat Vanellope so I can finally unlock her for the home version and then I'll let you play."

Joe then goes to select the memory card icon and selected his racer named Butterfinger Billy, a light skinned boy with blonde spiky hair, blue goggles atop his head, an orange jacket with two B's on the back in the style of the "Butterfinger" logo, black fingerless gloves, blue pants, and black sneakers. The boy gave a cheesy grin and a peace sign upon selection.

"Who's Butterfinger Billy?" asked the girl, "I've never seen him before."

"He's a console exclusive kart racer," said Joe, "Brought him and his kart from home in my memory card."

Back in the game at the starting line, Billy and his kart materialized in the starting line up next to Vanellope's kart.

"Whoa, you're new," said Vanellope, "Who are you?"

"Butterfinger Billy is the name and winning races is my game," said Billy as he lowered his goggles.

"Well you haven't raced a racer like me," said Vanellope as she revved her engines.

Over at the stands, Ralph, Felix, and Sgt. Calhoun were watching curiously at the new racer.

"What kind of a name is 'Butterfinger'?" asked Ralph.

"I think it's some sort of product placement," said Felix.

"Whoever he is, the boy doesn't stand a chance," said Calhoun.

"I don't know about that," said Felix, "She isn't the player character this time around so she can't really use her glitching without someone getting suspicious."

"How can you say such a thing?! Kid's got this in the bag! YOU'VE GOT THIS KID!" shouted Ralph from the stand, "Show that Chick-O-Stick wannabe what you're really made of!"

"I will, stinkbrain!" shouted Vanellope as she turned to the stands and with a big smile she gave Ralph and the others a thumbs up.

Billy turned to the stands and stared at Ralph in disbelief for a few seconds.

"Is that...? Nah..." he said as he quickly shook his head and faced the road once more.

As the countdown reached 0, the racers sped off. Vanellope was in the lead at first, Taffyta was tailing her in second, Rancis was in third, Candlehead was in fourth, and Billy was in fifth. Through the long stretch of road, Billy grabs his first item box which contained a "Sugar Rush" which he uses to boost past Candlehead. Now he was neck in neck with Rancis. He slams his car into Billy's, trying to veer him off the road, but they come to a sharp corner where Billy power slides around and Rancis is sent crashing into the Candy Cane Forest.

The only thing standing between Billy and Vanellope was Taffyta. Every attempt Billy would make to maneuver around Taffyta, she would always swerve to block his path. After running into another item box, Billy rolled a Jawbreaker in the roulette. The jawbreaker was like the sweet seeker minus the seeking part plus it could bounce against walls. He then launches his jawbreaker, sending it past Taffyta.

"Ha ha! You missed!" taunted Taffyta.

"Wait for it..." said Billy.

The jawbreaker bounced against the walls ahead like a pinball, bouncing at a 30 degree angle with each rebound. As Taffyta continued cruising ahead at full speed unaware of the jawbreaker rebounding from the side, it collides into her cart sending her tumbling backwards. Now it was just Vanellope and Billy.

"Vanellope Von Schweetz, you are mine..." chuckled Billy.

Back at the stands...

"Jiminy Jaminy! That Butterfinger fella is really good," said Felix, "It's only the first lap and he's already in 2nd place."

"Beginner's luck, if you ask me..." muttered Calhoun.

"Yeah, show him no mercy, kid!" shouted Ralph.

And for most of the race, Vanellope and Billy kept trading places for 1st place. It was the final lap and the final stretch. Vanellope was ahead by a few feet, but Billy had one trick left up his sleeve: he had stored a sweet seeker.

"VICTORY!" shouted Billy as he launched the sweet seeker.

Everything began to move in slow motion for Vanellope. She looked behind her in shock as the sweet seeker was moving in closer. She wasn't ready to lose. Not today and especially not to a guest racer. So at the very last second she glitched, causing the sweet seeker to fly harmlessly past her. Billy looked in disbelief as Vanellope flew past the finish line.

In the real world, Joe looked on in shock at what just happened...

"You've gotta be kidding me!" shouted Joe in frustration as he banged his head against the steering wheel and groaned very loudly in disappointment.

Vanellope was scared for a moment. She was afraid that the player would tell Mr. Litwak about her glitching and her game would be unplugged.

"Ugh... Rubberband AI at it's worse..." sighed Joe, "I was so close..."

Vanellope released a sighed of relief. It was a good thing he only thought it was blatant rubberband AI. As Ralph and the others ran from down the stands to celebrate Vanellope's victory, Billy hopped from out of his car, lifted his goggles atop his head, and walked up to the girl with a puzzled look on his face.

"Did you see me, Ralph?" asked Vanellope in glee.

"Sure did, kid," said Ralph, "But you gotta be careful. You're lucky Joe just thought it rubberbanding."

"Okay, how'd you do that?" asked Billy as he crossed his arms.

"You mean how'd I do... this?" she asked as she teleported behind him.

"Glitching? So you cheated, then," said Billy as he cocked an eyebrow.

"Don't think of it as cheating," said Vanellope, "Think of it as a CPU drone advantage."

"Yeah, sure," said Billy flatly, "If this were a Midway developed game..."

"You're from Sugar Rush, but I've never seen you before," said Vanellope, "You're now from another game going Turbo are you?"

Before Billy could answer her question, a warning announcement was being made.

"Warning, memory card saving," boomed a disembodied voice.

"That's my cue. Gotta go!" said Billy as he hopped into his cart and drove off, "Catch you later."

"Wait, I wanna talk to you some more!" shouted Vanellope as she hopped into her cart and drove after him.

"Kid wait!" shouted Ralph as he ran after her.

"Jaminy! What's Vanellope doing?" asked Felix.

"We better go after them," said Calhoun as she and Felix hopped on their cruiser, grabbed Ralph, and sped off.

Billy was racing off the track and into what appeared to be a large rectangular dock in the distance with Vanellope following suit. After parking into the dock, Billy steps out of his car only to be met with Vanellope parking next to him.

"What are you doing here?" asked Billy.

"I gotta know!" said Vanellope, "Why have I never seen you before in the game? Where did you come from? What's a Butterfinger?"

"No! You have to get out of here! NOW!" urged Billy, "You shouldn't be here!"

"Still mad that I beat you?" teased Vanellope.

"You don't understand," said Billy, "This is the memory card dock! You have to get out before-"

Suddenly, Billy and Vanellope both tumbled to the ground from the sudden shaking. They could see Sugar Rush slowly getting further and further.

"It's too late!" moaned Billy, "Joe's pulling the memory card out!"

Ralph, Felix, and Calhoun arrive to the seen only to see Vanellope and Billy being pulled away from Sugar Rush through the card port.

"VANELLOPE!" shouted Ralph as he tried to run to her but was held back by Calhoun and Felix.

"RALPH!" shouted Vanellope as Sugar Rush was getting further and further.

"NO! LET ME GO!" shouted Ralph as he was struggling against his friends holding him back, "I gotta save her!"

"Ralph, it's too far out! You'll never make it!" said Felix.

"There's nothing we can do for now," said Calhoun.

The memory card was gone from sight. Ralph could only stare in disbelief. Vanellope was gone. The one character that gave him a new lease on life was now gone. After finally being let go, all he could do was scream at the top of his lungs and smash nearly everything in sight. Felix looked to his wife in sadness as did she. After his little rage fit, Ralph sat on a nearby jawbreaker and began to sulk.

"Don't worry," said Calhoun as she walked up to him. "We'll get her back. I don't know how, but we will."

Outside of the machine, Joe pocketed his memory and walked away.

"All yours kid," he said to the Jennifer as he walked off in search of his next machine.

As he was making his way to his next game he noticed that Mr. Litwak was talking to a man with balding gray hair and a business suit.

"And I am willing to offer you $750,000 for your arcade," said the man in the suit.

"What's going on?" asked Joe.

"This gentleman here is offering to buy up the arcade," said Litwak.

"How do you do?" asked the man in the suit as he extended his hand towards Joe, "I'm Mr. Walter Black. I'm pretty sure you've heard of my Mega Burger food chains."

"Why yes I have," said Joe ignoring Mr. Black's gesture, "And let me say that I think that your burgers taste like old shoes."

"I see you quite a sense of humor there," chucked Mr. Black.

"So does this mean that the arcade is gonna be under new management then?" asked Joe, "Let me guess, your first order of business will be to hike up the quarter intake on all the machines?"

"Actually, no," said Mr. Black, "See what I'm planning to do is get rid of all these... 'Carnival Games' and turn this building into the newest location for the next Mega Burger restaurant."

"What? But there's already a Mega Burger down the street!" replied Joe, "In fact, you can't even go a block without walking into one!"

"It's a little thing called franchising," said Mr. Black, "You probably wouldn't understand considering that you are a consumer and not a business man such as myself. It's the only logical move"

"Will it at least have a play place?" asked Joe.

Ha ha ha... no," said Mr. Black flatly, "Mega Burger is a family establishment and children will be plenty entertained by the toys included in our kids' meals."

"Those things are made of cheap plastic! They fall apart just by touching the grease from the fries!" exclaimed Joe, "You can't do this Mr. Litwak!"

"Sorry, Joe, but the place just isn't making enough money to justify keeping it running like it used to," said Mr. Litwak.

"So the only logical thing to do would be to sell it to me," said Mr. Black.

"But I've been coming here ever since I was a little boy," said Joe, "As I grew up I watched as every other arcade closed down one by one all around me. Sure, there were a few cabinets in laundromats & bowling alleys but they just aren't the same. I mean they're always so filthy with sticky buttons and broken controller, but not this place. I always thought that at least Litwak's would always be there."

Litwak was a little touched by Joe's sentiment for the place, but Mr. Black, however just rolled his eyes and pointed his finger into mouth in a gagging motion.

"Ugh, you sound like a 90s after school special," said Mr. Black dryly, "Listen young man, arcades are just another worthless relic of the past like roller disco and the elderly. They can't compete with home consoles, iPhones, and free internet flash games. I mean, who would want to spend quarters in an arcade when they can they stay in the comfort of their homes and play video games for a 1 time fee?"

"Mr. Litwak, what if I could figure out a way to get the arcade to make more money?" asked Joe, "Would you reconsider selling?"

"I suppose I could," said Mr. Litwak, "I really would hate to see the place go."

"Well, Mr. Litwak, I'll be back when you change your mind," said Mr. Black as he was leaving.

"You mean _if_ he changes his mind," said Joe.

"Ha ha... no I don't," said Mr. Black as he walked out of the front door.

"So, exactly what do you have planned to save the arcade?" asked Litwak, "Whatever it is, I'll see you Monday morning and remember, I and all the patrons are depending on you."

Joe could feel a lump in his throat as the seriousness of the situation began to set in. The fate of Litwak's Arcade rested on a young man's shoulder. A young man who had no experience running a business. A young man who could barely make minimum wage at a grocery store.

"Oh, what have I gotten myself into?" Joe whispered himself.

**End Chapter**

* * *

_Atuhor's Nose, er,__ Author's Notes:_

_This has been my first fanfic in quite some time. Recently I finally got to watch Wreck-It Ralph on DVD. It had been something I had been wanting to do ever since it came out in theaters, but never did because I couldn't afford movie tickets. The DVD finally showed up at the library and I loved every minute of it. In fact I've watched it 3 times already which is pretty rare for me to do with movies I check out from the library. I was also very surprised that my favorite character in the movie wound up being Vanellope Von Schweetz, considering all the not so pleasant things that I've heard of Sarah Silverman._

_Then I started thinking, wouldn't it be cool to explore the world of console gaming and the internet? This isn't exactly something new to WIR fanfiction but I haven't really done anything productive in a very long time and I LOVE video games so I decided 'why not?' and so here we are._

_The explanation for the GameCube memory card port in Sugar Rush sounds pretty flimsy, I admit, but I was thinking between this or an N64 memory pak. Then I noticed how Sugar Rush Speedway looked way too good to be a game made in 1997(from the gamer's point of view, not inside the game) and although it probably still wouldn't look as good if it were a 128-bit game, it's a little more believable IMHO._

_Butterfinger Billy... A Sugar Rush OC is pretty cliche, I know but before you ask, no I did not create him to pair him up with Vanellope(waits for sighs of relief to stop). I was just thinking about how much I wanted a Butterfinger while I was looking at Sugar Rush and imagined what a racer based on the Butterfinger brand would be like, plus I needed a way to get Vanellope out of the arcade. Appearance wise, he's a bit more Americanized than the other Sugar Rush racers and that will be explained in the next chapter. The goggles and spiky hair were based on Jack Spicer from Xiaolin Showdown and the colors of his attire were to match the colors of Butterfinger wrappers. _

_While you can imagine the voices however you like, here are voices that I like to imagine hearing from the characters' mouths. It also kinda helps me get a better idea on how to write the characters. The voice cast for the movie characters are the same but for the OCs:_

_Joe: Jerry Trainer_

_Butterfinger Billy: David Spade_

_Mr. Black: John Lithgow_

_ And that's just for this chapter. I don't wanna give away any spoilers. I've already compiled a character list with a voice actor for each them._

_Yeah, pretty long author's note, huh? Anyway, reviews are much appreciated and I'll see you next chapter._


	2. Change the System

**Chapter 2: Change the System**

Joe turned on the lights in his room, revealing a rather larger room filled with many different video game memorabilia ranging from NES posters to Halo action figures plus a shelf which housed a very impressive library of games. An HDTV was hooked up on the side and connected to it was a Nintendo Wii, a Playstation 2, a Playstation 3, Xbox 360, and a Sega Dreamcast. Next to those was a desk which held his PC, router, and modem. All of these things were hooked up to a surge protector. Joe considered himself a hardcore gamer, though not of the discriminating kind. He played games of all genres, no matter the platform. PC, console, handheld, arcade... he's played them all. That's not to say he was some anti-social basement nerd. He had friends, but they weren't into gaming as much he is. They'd come by for the occasional multiplayer party but that was it.

The fate of Litwak's Arcade was in his hands and he needed to do some thinking. For him the thing that helped him think most were video games, so he turned on his Wii and popped in the Sugar Rush Speedway GC disc.

"JOE! IT'S TIME FOR DINNER!" shouted a female voice.

"I'll be right there, mom!" said Joe.

Joe still lived with his mother, which was rather embarrassing considering how he was 26 years old and it seemed to reinforce the "geek" stereotype. It wasn't so much that he didn't want to leave. It was that he couldn't. The economy had not been kind to him. Every decent paying job seemed to require some sort of experience these days. Even something as menial as flipping a hamburger patty. He needed experience to get a job, but he needed a job to get experience. It was a vicious cycle that he just couldn't break. He was just thankful that one of his buddies helped him get a job at the grocery store as a cashier. It didn't pay much, but it was better than nothing. His mother works as a waitress at a diner and is struggling just to pay the bills ever since his father passed away a few years ago, so that's another reason why he hasn't left the nest. It was just him, his mother, and his 13 year old sister.

As Joe left the room leaving his Wii on, someone else was having their own predicaments... Vanellope and Billy were both tumbling down from the sky where the Memory Card slot was and were heading on a collision course to the ground! Luckily for them, they safely landed on two gumdrops and bounced to the ground.

"Yeah, you gotta watch that first step," joked Billy he picked himself up, "It's a real doozy. I miss the old GameCube's horizontal card docks..."

"Where are we?" asked Vanellope as she brushed off the candy dust from her teal hoodie.

"Where are we, she says," said Billy, "You're in Sugar Rush!"

"But we just left Sugar Rush," said Vanellope, "How did we get back?"

"We're not in _your_ Sugar Rush, obviously," said Billy, "This is the console version of Sugar Rush. An incredible simulation, don't you think?"

Billy was right. It looked exactly like her Sugar Rush. Everything was there from the Candy Cane Forest to her own castle. Nearly every last detail was exactly the same as the arcade's Sugar Rush.

"This is so amazing," said Vanellope half excitedly, "But I really shouldn't be here."

"Gee, now where did I hear that before," Billy asked himself, "Oh that's right, that was exactly what I told _you_ at the memory card dock!"

"Alright, alright! You made you point smart molasses," said Vanellope as she rolled her eyes, "Now maybe you can help me get back home?"

"Sure, and while I'm at it why don't I go find a magical purple unicorn that can teleport us there with the magic of friendship," said Billy in a mocking tone, "I can't take you back to the arcade!"

"Why not?" asked Vanellope annoyed.

"Because Joe lives too far away from Litwak's!" explained Billy, "And since Litwak's is closed on Sunday, we have to wait until he takes his memory card back to the Sugar Rush machine on Monday and that's if he can even save the arcade!"

"So you're saying I'm stuck here?!" asked Vanellope in horror.

"Like gum in hair," said Billy, "So you may as well make yourself at home."

"You know what? You're right," said Vanellope as she started running in the direction of her castle.

"Hey! Where are you going?" asked Billy as he ran after her.

"Home? Guh doy!" said Vanellope.

As she ran to the front doors of the castle she pulled on one of the doors... only to find that it won't budge. She kept pulling and pulling with all her might, but the doors would not move an inch.

"Hey What gives!?" asked Vanellope as she kept tugging the door. She also tried glitching through the wall but to no avail as she simply went splat and slowly slid to the ground, "Why can't I get in my own castle!"

"It's because you're not unlocked," said Billy, "Well, not 'you'. This game's you."

"Come again?" asked Vanellope.

"Inside that castle is this game's Vanellope Von Schweetz," explained Billy, "If I had beaten you in the race, I would've gotten an unlock key to unlock her. When you unlock her, you get a cutscene of the castle doors opening with her finally coming out and her castle as a bonus track."

"So you've never unlocked her?" asked Vanellope.

"No, because we had to race and beat you in the arcade version to unlock you," said Billy, "But we never could because every time Joe played the game, you were never on the daily roster for years. It was always a combination of everyone else and that King Candy jerk who, by the way, is not supposed to be in the game. Mind explaining why you never showed up and he did?"

"It's kind of a long story," said Vanellope.

"And I'm guessing that long story ties into your little glitchy thing, too?" asked Billy.

"You've got the mind of a steel trap..." said Vanellope dryly, "Just shut up and let me tell you the story, nougat brain."

A few minutes pass and Vanellope was finishing up the story...

"...And then I passed the finish line, resetting the game's code and I was no longer a glitch," said Vanellope as she teleported around Billy, "Mostly."

"So you went through years of taking abuse all because of some attention seeking dork from a game from the dinosaur age?" said Billy with a hint of anger in his voice, "If I had known, I'd have given that King Candybutt a good ol' tire induced facelift years ago!"

"If you wanted to unlock me- I mean her so bad, why didn't you just use cheat codes?" asked Vanellope.

"No doy! You didn't think we tried that? There are no cheat codes," said Billy, "Joe even tried getting an action replay, but nobody has ever posted an unlock code online. Beating you in the arcade game is the only known way to unlock you. He's unlocked literally every single thing except you and your castle. He's even unlocked Diet Cola Mountain."

"I thought Diet Cola mountain was an unfinished track," said Vanellope.

"In the arcade version, maybe," said Billy, "They had extra development time in this one so it's complete, but it's a battle arena here."

"Battle arena, huh?" smirked Vanellope curiously.

"Yeah, we got other modes like time trial, battle mode, elimination race..." said Billy as he was counting the fingers on his hand, "We can play battle mode if you want. Oh! But first I want you to meet the rest of the gang!"

Billy grabbed her hand and pulled her along. After running for what felt like forever, they finally make it to the race track where all the other racers were getting their karts ready. Vanellope was surprised that they were all the same racers from her game... all except two that she never saw before, matching the art style of Billy: one male and one female.

"Hey, guys, I'm back and I brought a friend," said Billy, "This is Vanellope Von Schweetz."

"Joe did it! He finally unlocked Vanellope and her castle!" shouted Rancis happily as everyone threw their hats up in the air with loud cheers.

"Yeah... no. She came through the memory card by accident. Sorry" said Billy as everyone groaned and booed in collective disappointment, "Now, I'm pretty sure you know Taffyta, Rancis, Candlehead, Gloyd, Snowanna, Crumbelina, Swizzle, Adorabeezle, Jubilina, and Minty."

"Guh DOY! They're in my game," said Vanellope as she rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, but I want you to meet the other two console exclusive racers besides me," said Billy, "That's Carl Crunch, representing Crunch bars."

Carl was a dark skinned boy with a fade haircut, wearing a blue and white hoodie, jean shorts, and sneakers.

"Hi there," said Carl as he waved to Vanellope.

"And that's Ruth, representing Baby Ruth bars," said Billy, pointing to a girl with red hair cropped to the side covering her right eye. She wore a silver and blue leather jacket, tight blue jeans, and black biker boots.

"So you're the rightful ruler of this candyland," said Ruth looking up and down at Vanellope, "You don't look like no princess to me."

"Well, you guys don't really look like Sugar Rush racers to me," said Vanellope back in a mocking tone.

"A back talker, huh?" asked Ruth threateningly as she walked closely to Vanellope just inches away from her face and sneered... before smiling and patting the girl's shoulder, "Ya got moxie kid. I like that."

"We're exclusive to the North American home port," said Billy, "And we were part of a product endorsement deal with Nestle."

"We were also designed to appeal to the North American gamers," said Carl, "Hence our culturally different appearances.

"We're stars 'n stripes exclusive, kid," said Ruth.

Why do you keep calling me kid?" asked Vanellope, "You're a kid, too!"

"Oh, don't mind her," said Carl, "She was programmed to act like a tough tomboy. And she's the only racer with a motorcycle. It makes her feel 'grown up'."

"Whoa! You got a motorcycle?" asked Vanellope.

"Yep, check it," said Ruth as she showed her bike which had Lifesavers for wheels, blue candy cane handle bars, and a red Jolly Rancher coated finish, "Fastest candied two wheeler on this side of the kingdom."

"If it's so fast, how come you can never beat me?" teased Billy.

"I do whenever Joe picks me!" barked Ruth.

"Which is almost never," mocked Billy.

"Let's all just settle down. We still have a guest," said Carl pointing to Vanellope.

All the other Sugar Rush racers began crowding around Vanellope, asking her questions and stuff... All except for Taffyta, who just looked at Vanellope with disapproval and walked away. Meanwhile it was closing time at Litwak's arcade and at Tapper's, Ralph was drowning his sorrows in root beer. After chugging down his mug, he tosses it aside next to the pile several other empty mugs.

"Another root beer, Tapper," said Ralph.

"Ralph, that was your 9th root beer," said Tapper, "Don't you think you've had enough?"

"I'LL TELL YOU WHEN I'VE HAD ENOUGH!" shouted Ralph as he banged his hand against the counter. Tapper just shrugged and handed the large wrecking machine another glass.

Felix and his wife, Sgt. Tamora Jean Calhoun entered Tapper to find their friend drinking mug after mug of root beer.

"There's the big lummox," said Calhoun as she and Felix sat next to Ralph.

"Ralph, buddy, you shouldn't blame yourself over what happened to Vanellope," said Felix.

"If only I had been there faster... the kid would still be here," lamented Ralph as he downed his next glass, "I was literally seconds away..."

"Listen, Butterball!" barked Calhoun, "Sitting here and feeling sorry for yourself ain't gonna bring the kid back. It's time to take affirmative action!"

"But where do we even begin?" asked Felix, "It would take forever to through every outlet in the city."

"Ever hear of the internet?" asked Calhoun.

"You mean that information freeway thingy?" aked Ralph.

"Well I hear that Joe is an online gamer, so that means he has to have an internet connection," said Calhoun.

"You're right," said Ralph excitedly as a smile rapidly grew on his face, "We can go on the internet and get Vanellope back! Wait, there's just one problem... We don't know where Joe's computer is."

"And I hear this inter-web thing is huge!" said Felix, "We could get lost without directions. How are we ever going to find his computer?"

Just then, four multiplayer soldier avatars from Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 entered the bar. Three were regular soldiers while one was a ghillie suit sniper.

"Lol, we totally pwned those n00bz" said one of the soldiers.

"Nuke boosting ftw!" said another soldier.

"And here comes the MW2 online gamer avatars coming from the internet cafe..." sighed Tapper, "What'll you be having tonight, boys?"

"UR mom! lol," taunted one of the soldiers.

"Four root beers it is then," said Tapper as he tossed each of them their drinks.

"Evening, gentlemen," said Ralph as he raised his glass to the soldiers who only looked at him in confusion.

"Ralph, what are you doing?" asked Felix.

"Tapper said they're from the internet," whispered Ralph, "If we act cool, I'm sure they can help us out."

"Um, yeah evening, um... okay what do interwebber gamers say" said Felix to himself as he was trying remember what those kids in the arcade would say when talking about online games, "Um, have you been pawning any knobs lately?"

"It's 'pwning noobs', dear," said Calhoun.

"Who the hell are you?" asked the lead soldier.

"I'm Fix-It Felix Jr, from the game Fix-"

"Lol, hes from that game were teh graffix sux!" said the ghillie suit sniper.

"My game's graphics are not terrible!" exclaimed Felix, "In fact, they were considered quite revolutionary back in the day."

"Yeah, there was no need to be rude like that," said Ralph.

"STFU, popeye hands!" piped another soldier.

"lol, pwned," said another soldier.

Ralph was beginning to regret asking these guys for help. They were loud, rude, and didn't seem to have quite a grasp on the English language.

"Listen here you trigger happy camping twits," barked Calhoun in an annoyed tone, "There's a little girl lost out there and we just need help looking for her through the internet so why don't you all just cooperate and tell us where we can find a gamer named Joe!"

"Why don't _you_ go back to the kitchen and make me a sandwich, woman!" taunted the lead soldier as all the other soldiers laughed. Then a very angry Felix hopped in between Calhoun and the MW2 soldier.

"Now see here you... YOU...! " threatened Felix angrily as he pointed at him and tightly balled up his other hand into a fist. He was so cross, his face was getting redder than Knuckles the Echidna covered in ketchup.

"I got this, Fix-It. Here's your sandwich. A KNUCKLE SANDWICH!" shouted Calhoun as she simply punched the soldier clear across the bar.

The other soldiers quickly responded by pulling out their guns and shooting at Calhoun who leaps out of the way and fires back with her own gun. The ghillie suit sniper had her in his scope ready to take a well aimed headshot but was suddenly finding himself hit over the head by Ralph's massive fists. He continued pounding the ghillie sniper on the head over and over again, spiking him into the ground with each impact like a tent stake.

Another soldier was firing at Felix who skillfully leapt and dodged every bullet. He pulls out his magic hammer and slams it into one of the bullets, deflecting the now much stronger bullet into the solder's chest, knocking him out. One soldier huddled up into a corner to camp, loading up his grenade launcher as Calhoun fired his direction. He aims into the air and shoots... only for it to bounce of a wall and back to him, noob tubing himself into oblivion. Felix watched as the lead soldier finally got up, pulled out his combat knife and ran towards Sgt. Calhoun as she fired her bullets at him. Felix thought it was downright foolish to continue running as he was being shot. His eyes then widened in horror upon realization just what he was doing...

"WATCH OUT, TAMMY!" screamed Felix, "HE HAS THE COMMANDO PERK!"

From a few feet away, the CoD soldier instantly warped from his position straight in front of Calhoun ready to plunge his knife into her chest. Just before the knife could touch her, a root beer mug shattered against the soldier's head, knocking him to the floor. Calhoun turned to the direction of where the mug was thrown to see Tapper who simply winked to her.

"You gotta know when the invincibility frames end," said Tapper.

"How'd you know about the commando thing?" asked Calhoun to Felix.

"I heard a bunch of people complaining about it back in 2009," said Felix.

After regaining their composure, the MW2 soldiers all ran out of the bar screaming.

"That's right, get out and stay out!" shouted Ralph, "Bunch of GI Jerks..."

"I apologize for that kerfuffle," said Felix as he began repairing the bar with his golden hammer.

"Not your fault," said Tapper, "Those darn avatars are always trolling and causing trouble where they go. You won't ever have to worry about them anymore because they're banned."

"An un-neighborly bunch aren't they?" muttered Felix.

"Such is the way of multiplayer avatars," said a voice with a french accent from somewhere in the room, "They usually take on the characteristics of their players if they were not designed to be specific characters. Some are less friendly than others."

They turn to see a thin man in a blue suit, gloves, and ski mask sitting on a stool with a martini glass in his hand. Ralph defensively puts his fist up, Felix got into a defensive stance, and Calhoun raises her gun and aims it at him.

"Gentlemen and gentle lady," said the man calmly, keeping his posture despite the threats, "I can assure you that I am not with those men. Allow me to introduce myself, I am the Spy from the online multiplayer game Team Fortress 2. As you can see, I was designed with a specific silhouette and personality."

"Well, Mr. Spy," said Felix as he put away his hammer, "I'm Fix-It Felix Jr from the game Fix-It Felix Jr. This is Wreck-It Ralph, also from the game Fix-It Felix Jr. And this is my dynamite gal, Sgt Tamora Jean Calhoun from the game Hero's Duty."

"Ah, the pleasure is mine," said the Spy as he grabbed Calhoun's hand and kissed it.

"Cut the chivalry bull, Pepe Le Puke!" said Calhoun as she quickly pulled her hand away.

"My apologies," said Spy as he straightened his tie, "I could not help but overhear that you are looking for someone on the internet. A friend, perhaps?"

"Actually, yeah," said Ralph, "You see, our friend accidentally got taken out of her arcade game and we need to get her back."

"I see," said Spy as he lit a cigarette and sipped his drink, "And would this friend have happened to have been from the Sugar Rush game?"

"How did you know?" asked Ralph in shock.

"I am a Spy," said Spy, "It is my job and in my code to know things."

"You wouldn't happen to know where Joe's computer is, would you?" asked Ralph.

"But of course!" said Spy, "On Team Fortress 2, he goes by the screen name of WreckItJoe486! I can give you his static IP address if you like."

"IP address?" asked Felix in confusion.

"I see you are not too familiar with the internet," said Spy, "Just think of it as a... street address for a house."

The Spy took a napkin from the counter and wrote down the numbers ""

"You should be able to travel to the internet through the internet cafe across the street. But before you take your trip through the internet, I recommend that you go to Google dot com first," said Spy, "You can find everything you need there, including a web browser to travel the information super highway."

"Thank you your generosity, good sir," said Felix.

"But of course!" said Spy as he got up, put on his fedora, and left his tip for Tapper, "But be warned, the internet can be a cruel mistress. Choose a secure browser and be wary of where you go. You never know what dangers my be lurking in every corner. I bid you all adieu and good luck."

And with his parting words, the Spy left the tavern.

"What a charming gentleman," said Felix.

"A little _too_ charming if you ask me," said Calhoun in an accusing tone, "Can we really trust this guy?"

Ralph looked at the napkin contain the IP address. Right now this was their only lead on getting Vanellope back to arcade.

"I say we give it a shot," said Ralph, "We're going to the internet, getting Vanellope back, and returning to the arcade before it opens on Monday. Are you guys with me or not?"

"I'm with you all the way," said Felix as he triumphantly held out his golden hammer, "We can fix this!"

"Count me in as well," said Calhoun.

_"Hang in there, kid,"_ thought Ralph to himself, imagining that Vanellope must be all alone and scared in a place she knows nothing about, _"We're coming..."_

**End Chapter**

* * *

_Author's Notes: _

_A little bit of trivia: the helpful patron at the bar was originally not Spy but a multiplayer soldier from Battlefield Bad Company 2. It was changed to Spy because I found it more fun to write dialogue for him than another generic soldier._

_Voice cast:_

_Carl Crunch: Alfonso Robeiro_

_Ruth: Nicole Sullivan_

_Joe's mother: Katey Sagal_

_And don't forget to review. Any critique is welcome._


	3. Good and Bad Connections

**Chapter 3: Good and Bad Connections**

"Now arriving at Google dot com station," said a female voice from a loud speaker as a subway car pulled up, "Have a pleasant day."

Ralph, Felix, and Calhoun all step out as the car doors slid open. They looked around and saw that the Google station wasn't unlike Game Central except that instead of outlets to games, there were portals to many different websites called "links". There were so many different links such as "IGN", "Youtube", "Amazon", "Ebay", "Equestria Daily", "Deviantart"... it was all so overwhelming. There were also many strange characters walking about. There was a man with a white face and very creepy grin that made Felix very uncomfortable.

"Problem?" grinned the man to Felix.

"Keep walking, weirdo," said Calhoun.

"Lol umad?!" said Trollface before he ran away from the sight of the Sergeant unsheathing her gun.

To the left of them there were several green men in black suits with no faces, to the right there was a cute pink pony with a fluffy pink mane hopping about, and flying above them was a strange cat with a pop tart for a body leaving a rainbow trail. There were also a bunch of Mudkips running past them. Ralph looked around until he saw a woman with brown hair wearing red and yellow framed glasses, a black turtle neck sweater, a lab coat and a black skirt sitting behind a help desk.

"Ah, there it is," said Ralph as he motion Felix and Calhoun to follow him, "Excuse me miss..."

"Google," said the lady, "You can call me Miss Google."

"Yeah, Miss Google, can you help us with something?"

"Just take a number and we will be with you shortly," said Miss Google motioning him to a number generator.

Ralph promptly pulls out a piece of paper from the number generator.

"What number are we?" asked Felix.

"5,312..." said Ralph as he looked at the paper.

"And who are they serving?" asked Felix.

Ralph turned to look at a red LED sign with a number on it which read...

"Now serving... 305?! Augh!" whined Ralph as he plopped down onto a nearby bench, "We're gonna be here for-"

"Now serving number 5,312," said Miss Google.

-ever?" said Ralph in bewilderment.

"Wow, now that is efficient," said Calhoun.

"We do happen to be one of the fastest search engines on the net," replied Miss Google, "So what can I do for you?"

"We were wondering if you can help us find the computer this IP thingy belongs to," said Ralph as he handed the woman the napkin.

"Unfortunately, we do not have direct link trains going to that or any particular ip addresses at this moment in time" said Miss Google, "The servers had recently been compromised by a virus and all direct links to IPs are currently closed."

"Jiminy Jaminy! A virus?" asked Felix.

"Great... more bugs..." grimaced Calhoun.

"Actually, this one wasn't a bug," said Miss Google, "He was a Trojan."

"He was from Troy?" asked Felix in a confused tone.

"No, Trojans are viruses who take on the disguise of harmless programs," said Miss Google.

**Flashback**

_"Last night an evil virus named Infectis appeared through an IP portal disguised as a game sprite. He claimed to have been from an old western themed flash game, but then he unleashed a swarm of viral bugs onto the site._"

A pale old man with jagged yellow teeth, wild gray hair, and a gray chin curtain beard wearing a black trench coat, a black western preacher's hat, and pitch black lensed round framed glasses stepped into the Google Station from a portal. As he opened his coat, a swarm of vicious bugs not unlike cybugs flew from underneath him.

_"The bugs began eating and infecting everything in sight. Walls, wires, codes, and even digital people who couldn't escape._ _He attempted to infect and delete the Google servers, but was stopped by the virus scanners._"

Floating robots began vaporizing the viral bugs. Soon, several glowing blue men dressed as police officers ran into the scene and began chasing Infectis who leaped into a portal, laughing evilly.

_"Last we saw of him, he escaped through a random web link into the internet."_

**End Flashback**

"Oh my land..." said Felix gravely, "What kind of person would do such a thing?"

"A virus would," explained Calhoun, "Their only mission is to destroy and they don't care who or what gets in their way."

"Okay, okay, viruses are bad. We get it," said Ralph, "But, c'mon, lady! You've gotta give us something! Anything!"

"I can give you directions to the address," said Miss Google, "But you'll have to travel there directly via web browser."

"We'll do it!" said Ralph eagerly.

"Then follow me," said Miss Google as she led them to a door.

Through that door, there was a showroom showcasing many different colored car-shaped vehicles except they had no wheels. Instead, they hovered above the ground.

"As you can see, we have a wide selection of web browsers for you to choose from," Said Miss Google, "There's Chrome, Opera, Internet Explorer..."

"Ooh! The Internet Explorer sounds perfect!" said Felix.

"I honestly wouldn't recommend it," said Miss Google, "It's pretty slow, it crashes all the time, and has very poor security features. The browser I would recommend would be FireFox..."

She leads them to a sleek orange and blue vehicle resembling a combination of an SUV and a computer mouse.

"Now that is one fine looking browser..." whistled Calhoun.

"The FireFox includes the latest in security features, bookmarking so you can easily remember what sites you you've been, add-on capabilities, internet radio, and is quite fast."

"We'll take it!" announced Ralph, "Felix, pay the lady."

"Let's see... I think I have some coins from Super Mario Bros. in my pocket," said Felix as he reached into his pocket.

"Oh, you don't have to pay me anything," said Miss Google, "Web browsers are free to use."

"Okay, then I guess we'll be on our way then," said Ralph.

Felix quickly hopped into the driver's seat, but realized that there was one little problem...

"I'm too short! My feet can't reach the pedals!" said Felix.

"And my feet are way too big," said Ralph.

"Looks like I'm gonna have to drive," said Calhoun, "But if either of you crack any 'woman drivers' jokes, so help me..."

"I call shotgun!" shouted Ralph.

Shotg- Oh butter biscuits!" whined Felix.

Meanwhile in Joe's Wii, Vanellope and the Sugar Rush racers had just finished up a game of team battle inside Diet Cola Mountain. The Red Team consisted of Vanellope, Carl, Snowanna, and Rancis while the blue team consisted of Taffyta, Ruth, Billy, and Gloyd. During the game, Vanellope had borrowed Candlehead's helmet and kart so as to not to make Joe suspicious.

"Team battle rules!" shouted Vanellope.

"I know! Isn't it awesome?" said Billy.

"For you, maybe," grimaced Taffyta as she and her kart looked worse for wear.

"C'mon Pinky, it's just a game," said Ruth.

"Except Billy kept on protecting the candy princess over there!" said Taffyta angrily as she pointed at Vanellope, "Even though she wasn't on the same team! You never once protected me and I was your teammate."

"She's new to battle mode, Taffyta," said Billy, "I was just giving her a beginner's handicap. I did the same thing for you when you were first unlocked."

"Except we were on the same team then!" huffed Taffyta.

"We still beat them, didn't we?" asked Gloyd, "You're welcome, by the way."

"Yeah, thanks a lot Carl," said Rancis angrily.

"The only reason I lost my last balloon was because of your reckless item spamming," retorted Carl.

Yeah, Rancis!" said Snowanna, "Don't go blaming Carl 'cause you can't aim."

It was true. Carl and Gloyd were the last ones standing on their respective teams each with one balloon left, but because Rancis shot a bunch of jawbreakers before losing all his balloons, Carl was hit by a stray jawbreaker before he had a chance to finish off Gloyd.

"Game saving. Disk will be ejecting soon," boomed a voice.

"That's our cue," said Carl, "We better get going."

"Where?" asked Vanellope.

"Home," said Billy.

"You mean you guys don't live in the game?" asked Vanellope.

"Console gaming is different than arcade gaming," said Ruth, "Where as an arcade machine can play one game and only one game, a console can play multiple games."

"Of course this means that only one game can be played at a time," said Carl, "This makes the disk channel a shared space, but other games can be allowed here at the same time as long as they're directly installed onto something like a hard drive; Such as virtual console and PSN games."

"So if you guys can't live inside your own games, then where do you live?" asked Vanellope.

"C'mon, we'll show you," said Billy.

All the race walked into an elevator with a sign reading "Wii Home Hall". The doors closed behind them and the elevator began to... well elevate downwards. With a ding, the elevator doors re-open and Vanellope's eyes were greeted with the sight of a large space that reminded her of Game Central, except instead of outlets there were elevator doors everywhere. Above each elevator door was a screen representing a Wii channel such as Mii Plaza, Internet Channel, and the Wii Shop Channel. Characters from different games were sprawling about including(but not limited to) Sonic the Hedgehog, the Super Mario Bros, Rayman, Goku from Dragonball Z Budokai, Samus, Link and Zelda, WWE's Undertaker and John Cena(from WWE Day of Reckoning), and Tony Hawk who was rapidly skating towards them.

"Coming through!" shouted Tony Hawk as he quickly skated past them and grinded on a nearby bench.

"Hey! Watch it, Tony!" shouted Billy, "Pro skaters... Gotta watch out for them."

They continued down the Wii Home Hall until they stopped in front of an elevator with a screen above it saying "Data Management". After getting off of that elevator and entering a door entitled "GameCube memory units Slot A", they walk down a hallway resembling an apartment complex. As they walk, they see a strange yellow animal with black stripes wearing brown gloves and red shorts with sun patterns on them beating against a door with a pair of boomerangs.

"What's up, Ty?" asked Carl.

"I can't seem to get inside my save data!" whined Ty the Tasmanian Tiger, "Joe didn't delete it, did he?"

"I think he moved your data into a new block in slot B to make room," chirped Candlehead

"Thanks, mate," said Ty as he walked away.

"Anyway, this is our home," said Billy as he opened the door.

Inside was a candy themed home interior that included rooms for every unlocked racer in the game. In the living room stood a peppermint striped sofa with a TV in front of it(perfect for viewing other games that were going on in the disk channel, especially sports games).

"So which one's my room?" asked Vanellope.

"It's locked," said Carl.

"I was thinking," said Taffyta, "Vanellope here can have your room and you-

"That is a great idea," said Billy, "I'll share my room with Vanellope!"

"WHAT?!" shouted Taffyta.

"Cool! It'll be like a sleep over!" said Vanellope as she bounced around.

"We can sleep on the floor together!" said Billy excitedly, "I even got these candy wrappers so when we go to sleep we can bundle ourselves up like a couple of little homeless people."

"Oh! And we can stay up and tell each other scary stories!" said Vanellope excitedly.

"I know a good one!" said Billy, "It's a really scary story about a game called Polybius!"

"Hey Taffyta!" Vanellope called out to the platinum blonde racer, "You wanna have a sleep over with us?"

"NO I DON'T WANT TO HAVE A SLEEPOVER WITH YOU!" snapped Taffyta as she stormed off, "Now good night!"

She then stormed into her room and slammed her door shut, causing a painting frame to fall off the nearby wall and shatter.

"Suit yourself, then," shrugged Billy.

Vanellope looked at Taffyta's door. Something was eating up at her and she wanted to get to the bottom of it.

Later that night... somewhere else... Joe found himself in a foggy junkyard. He didn't know exactly how he got here... or even where "here" was for that matter. There was an overcast in the sky and junk was piled everywhere: TVs, cars, refrigerators... but what disturbed him most where that there were arcade cabinets everywhere. All of them were from Litwak's arcade and all of them were broken down.

"Wait, what's going on?" asked Joe, "Why are all the arcade games here?"

"Because of you," said a familiar voice from voice behind.

Joe quickly spun around to see Mr. Litwak. He had a look of disappointment in his face.

"You couldn't save the arcade and Mr. Black just threw them all away," he explained.

"No..." whispered Joe to himself.

Suddenly, lightning struck from the sky and hit the Fix-It Felix Jr. Arcade machine. The screen began lighting up and a large hand burst from the side of the cabinet. Out stepped Wreck-It Ralph and Fix it Felix Jr, both with glowing pale blue skin and blank yellow eyes. Their clothing and hair were disheveled and covered in dirt giving them a zombie-like appearance.

"The whole arcade was counting on you!" said Ralph angrily, "And you blew it!"

"You killed us!" shouted Felix.

Suddenly, more digital "zombies" started bursting from their cabinet caskets.

"We trusted you," groaned Ryu from Street Fighter.

"We put all our hope in you," said Yuni from DDR.

"We all believed in you!" said Sonic.

"We had-a faith in you!" said Mario.

Then from the side of the Sugar Rush machine, a zombified Vanellope Von Schweetz slowly walked out of her cabinet casket with tears streaming from her eyes.

"Why did you let us all die, Joe?" wept Vanellope, "Why couldn't you save us?"

Joe opened his mouth but nothing could come out. He just couldn't think of an explanation.

"I'll tell you exactly why!" barked a zombified Sgt. Calhoun, "Because he's a failure! He's failed at everything he's ever done in his life."

"NO!" sobbed Joe as he fell to his knees, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!"

The sky grew darker as a shadow loomed over the arcade graveyard. In the horizon stood a giant Mr. Black laughing maniacally.

"HAVE A MEGA BURGER ON ME! OR SHOULD I SAY ON YOU! HA HA HA HA!"

Joe screamed as a giant hamburger patty fell from the sky, crushing him flat. Suddenly he jolted upwards finding himself in now his bed, gasping in a cold sweat. It was all just a dream. No, it was a horrible nightmare. A nightmare that could come to pass if he didn't do something. Now he meant business. Starting tomorrow morning he was going to think of a way to save Litwak's.

**End Chapter**


	4. Peanut Butter & Strawberries?

**Chapter 4: Peanut Butter and Strawberries?**

"Why is Felix sitting in the front seat?" complained Ralph, "I called shotgun."

"Will you quit your bellyaching already?" asked Calhoun as she kept her eyes glued on the road.

"Hey, all I'm saying is that when someone calls shotgun it should mean they ride shotgun," said Ralph, "At least it's roomy back here..."

When they said it was an information super highway, they weren't kidding. There were phone line roads as far as the eye can see going in every direction. Millions of large buildings representing websites and their servers were everywhere. The sky was filled with clouds comprised of 0s and 1s. As Ralph was taking in the scenery, the web browser suddenly swerved, jerking Ralph to the side causing him to hit his head on the door. As he rubbed his temples, he looked out the window to see that another web browser was driving on the wrong side of the road.

"GET OFF THIS SIDE OF THE ROAD!" Calhoun shouted out the window, "What kind of idiot drives on the left side of the highway, anyway?"

Ralph looked back to see that the license plate on the web browser had the words 'UK' on it.

"Tourists..." sighed Ralph(no offense to anyone from the UK).

"Technically, we're tourists too," said Felix.

The three game characters continue sitting in silence as Calhoun kept on driving.

"So... how have things been with you two?" asked Ralph in an attempt to break the silence.

"Just lovely," said Felix, "We've decided to move in together in the penthouse of Fix-It Felix Jr and we may consider adopting pretty soon."

"That's good," said Ralph.

"And how's the old shack?" asked Felix.

"Still in the dump," said Ralph.

"Yeah..." said Felix.

The browser was filled with an air of silence. Uncomfortable, awkward silence.

"Hey, you guys wanna hear a joke?" asked Ralph.

"I don't think now is a time for jokes," said Calhoun.

"Tammy, I'm sure we could all use a good laugh," said Felix.

"Fine, go ahead," said Calhoun.

"Okay, why did the hero flush the toilet?" asked Ralph.

"I don't know. Why?" asked Calhoun.

"Because it was his DUTY!" chuckled Ralph.

"Wait a minute! Did you just insult my game?" asked Calhoun in an angry tone.

"It was just a joke," said Ralph.

"Well I have a joke for you!" growled Calhoun.

"Tammy, I really don't think that-" Piped in Felix.

"No! I want him to hear this," said Calhoun, "Why did the bad guy decide to game jump and almost destroy the arcade? Because he was tired of being down in the DUMPS!"

"Hey! I didn't even mean to insult you with that joke!" fumed Ralph.

"Then why did you even tell it?" asked Calhoun irritated.

"Because Vanellope told me that joke!" said Ralph, "In fact it was one of the things she said on the day we first met."

"Oh... I didn't know," said Calhoun in a softer voice, "I'm... I'm sorry."

"Yeah... I'm sorry too..." apologized Ralph.

Awkward silence once again filled the browser and they continued down the phone-line road. An idea than popped into Felix's head.

"Hey, you know what we need to break this awkward silence? Some tunes!" said Felix as he turned on the radio.

"IT'S FRIDAY! FRIDAY! GOTTA GET DOWN ON FRIDAY!" boomed a female voice from the radio.

"OW, SWEET MOTHER HUBBARD! MY EARS!" shouted Ralph as he covered.

"WHAT IS THIS GARBAGE?!" shouted Calhoun.

"I DON'T KNOW!" shouted Felix, "BUT IT'S MOST CERTAINLY NOT MUSIC!"

"TURN IT OFF!" shouted Calhoun.

"I CAN'T!" shouted Felix as he kept trying to fiddle with the knobs, "IT'S STUCK!"

"THAT'S IT! MOVE OUT OF THE WAY!" shouted Ralph as he pushed Felix aside and began to rapidly wreck the radio with his fists and the "singing" began to die.

"Oh, sweet silence!" said Calhoun in relief.

"I can fix it and we can try again," said Felix as he pulled out his magic hammer.

"NO!" shouted both Ralph and Calhoun in unison with a tone of horror in their voices.

"Awkward silence it is then," said Felix quickly as he slumped into his seat. This was gonna be a _loooong_ trip.

Meanwhile in the real world at Joe's house, Joe's mother, Kathy, was getting herself ready for work. Kathy had black hair that was held by a blue hair band and was wearing a blue diner's waitress uniform. Just then, the doorbell rings.

"I got that," said Kathy as she made her way to the door.

When Kathy opened the door, there stood Jennifer the "Moppet girl".

"Good morning, Jennifer," said Kathy, "Are you here to see Sarah?"

"Actually, I'm here to see Joe," said Jennifer, "I need to talk to him about something."

As Kathy led Jennifer into the living room, she saw Joe was standing next to a small portable dry erase board trying to write down ideas. In that same living room was Joe's little sister, Sarah, who was sitting on the sofa watching TV. She was a black haired girl in a blue T-Shirt shirt and dark blue skirt.

"How about free hats?" asked Joe, "Everybody likes hats."

"Really? Free hats?" asked Sarah.

"Fine, no free hats," said Joe as he crossed that out in the board and noticed Jennifer, "Oh hey, Jen. What brings you here?"

Jennifer closely examined the dry erase board and there were a lot of ideas; all of them crossed out. Among the crossed out ideas were "Free Hat Day", "Free Play Fridays", "Kissing Booth"(this one was scribbled out really hard), "Breakdancing Monkey Costume to wear in front of the arcade", "Video game trivia contests", "Fix-It Felix Jr. Marathon", and "steal everyone else's game systems".

"I heard you were going to try to save Litwak's," said Jennifer, "So I came here to help."

"Thanks, but I really need to do this kind of thing on my own," said Joe.

"Hey, I love Litwak's just as much as you do," said Jennifer, "And the town really doesn't need another Mega Burger. Also judging by you 'ideas' it looks like you need all the help you can get."

"I don't see what the big deal is," said Sarah, "It's just an arcade..."

"It's the last real arcade in town," said Jennifer, "And some of those games never got console releases."

"And it's more than an arcade to me," said Joe, "As silly as it sounds, I think of those video games as old friends and that's their home. I don't want them to be homeless."

"No, it doesn't sound silly," said Sarah, "It sounds downright stupid!"

"This coming from the preteen who can't bear to part with her iPod," mocked Kathy, "I work down the street from Litwak's and if that Mega Burger opens, it could really hurt business at the diner so that's not the only thing in danger."

Jennifer looked over at a shelf and noticed a large shiny gold trophy in the shape of a video game controller with Joe's name on it.

"Hey, what's this?" she asked as she tried to get a closer look.

"That's something I won when I was 13," said Joe, "It was at some video game tournament at one of the old video stores. I won first place and a week of free game rentals. It attracted the attention of all the local hardcore gamers and the tournament itself made over $13,000. The proceeds went to charity."

"Wait, that's it!" said Jennifer excitedly, "We'll have a gaming tournament at Litwak's."

"Why didn't I think of that sooner?" asked Joe, "We can hand out flyers and charge a sign up fee. This might actually work."

"And I didn't even have to use a dry erase board, either," said Jennifer proudly.

"Now all we have to do is talk to Litwak and see what he thinks," said Kathy.

Meanwhile, Vanellope and Billy had spent the entire morning game jumping. They had been to SSX Tricky, Sonic Adventure 2: Battle, NBA Jam, Super Mario Galaxy, Need For Speed Underground, and more. They had been mostly spectating, but they had fun nonetheless. Now they were driving their karts through the "Electronics Station" surge protector(named because it housed more than just games).

"So where are we going now?" asked Vanellope excitedly.

"Just follow me and you'll see!" said Joe as he sped off into an outlet labeled _Joe's Computer_.

Vanellope quickly followed him. While driving down the long stretch, Billy decided to drive on the side of the tunnel in a gravity defying stunt.

"You call _that_ driving?" asked Vanellope and as she began driving upside down... AND backwards, "THIS is driving!"

"Showoff!" shouted Billy playfully.

They continued driving until there was a light at the end. After finally reaching that light, they both put on the breaks of their karts. They were in the middle of a very large metropolis with tall buildings, wires, and hover cars going up and down streets. In the center of the city was the tallest building that had the words _System32_ on it.

"Welcome to Dell City," said Billy.

"Wow! This is a computer?" asked Vanellope, "It's so BIG!"

"I know! Let me show you around," said Billy as he revved up his kart.

As Billy drove around the city with Vanellope, showing her all the buildings that housed files and stuff, Vanellope was messing around with him, glitching her kart ahead of his periodically. The fun and games came to an end however as they heard the wailing of a siren behind them.

"Uh oh! Virus Scanners," said Billy.

"Virus scanners?" asked Vanellope.

The two kart racers pulled their vehicles over as the squad car behind them came to a stop. Out of that squad car stepped a rather mean looking old man in a police officer's uniform with a very stern look on his face.

"Great... Chief Norton," said Billy as he looked at car mirror, "Just act cool..."

"Well well well..." said Norton as walked up to the racers' karts, "If it isn't the little go karting munchkin from that cavity inducing game Candy Racers."

"Sugar Rush..." corrected Billy, "And why did you stop us? We weren't doing anything wrong?"

"I saw glitching nearby," said Norton, "And I suppose this is your partner in crime?"

"Hi, mister!" said Vanellope in a cheery tone.

Norton simply grimaced at the little girl whose smile slowly faded away. He then turned to Billy.

"Who is this?" asked Norton.

"Yeah, she's new here," said Billy, "She's just visiting for a couple of days."

"You know how I feel about outsiders in my system," said Norton in a menacing tone.

"Relax, she's just another game character," said Billy.

"A glitchy game character at that," said Norton as he turned back to Vanellope, "I saw what you were doing back there."

"That wasn't glitching," said Vanellope, "I just have pixlexia."

"Hmph. Pixlexia," scoffed Norton, "They always say they have pixlexia! This system is a glitch free zone! One wrong glitch in the system could bring the firewall down and we'll be helpless against a virus invasion! Trojans, worms, spyware... It will be utter chaos!"

"So... Can we go now?" asked Vanellope.

"Fine! Carry on, children," said Norton, "But remember I'll be watching you. Especially _you_, glitch! If I catch you glitching again... Oh, you'll see because I _will_ catch you glitching again!"

Norton then got back into his squad car and drove away into the distance.

"Is he always this beaming with sunshine?" asked Vanellope dryly.

"Eh, don't mind him," said Billy, "He's been here since the days of MS-Dos. He's pretty strict and grouchy when it comes to 'potential threats'."

"How am I a threat?" asked Vanellope.

"The systems have been glitch free for years and he wants to keep it that way," explained Billy as he rolled his eyes, "He thinks any kind of glitch in the system is a potential threat. As long as you don't glitch, you'll be fine."

"There you are!" shouted a familiar female voice.

It belonged to Taffyta Muttonfudge who was stomping angrily to their karts wearing a pink fur coat and holding a pair of Skis.

"Where were you?" she whined, "We were supposed to go skiing together at Ski or Die at the NES emulator and I have been waiting for over an hour! You promised weeks ago!"

"Ah fudge bars! That was today, wasn't it?" asked Billy as he slapped his forehead, "I was just showing Vanellope-"

"Vanellope! Vanellope! Vanellope!" mocked Taffyta, "_I'm_ your best friend, not her!"

"Best friend?" asked Vanellope to herself.

"I thought Candlehead was your best friend," said Billy, "Why didn't you just go with someone else?"

"We're still close friends," said Taffyta, "And I don't think you're taking our friendship seriously."

"Taffyta, don't you think you're over-" said Vanellope before she was cut off.

"Butt out, you little glitch!" hissed Taffyta. "Things were just fine before you came along!"

"Hey! Not cool, Lady Staw-Ga!" said Billy, "She didn't even do anything to you!"

"Hey, I can take care of myself!" said Vanellope defensively, "I'm not some helpless little kid!"

"Fine, I'll let you two work it out, then. I was just trying to help you out," said Billy as he walked across the street, "Girls..."

After Billy had disappeared from view, Vanellope turned towards a very bitter Taffyta.

"Okay, what _is_ your problem?" asked Vanellope, "You've been crabby ever since I got here. Even moreso that the real Taffyta. Care to explain why?"

"It's nothing! Just leave me alone!" sulked Taffyta as she sat on a nearby bench.

"Look, just because I'm a better racer than you..." started Vanellope.

"You think this is about racing?" snapped Taffyta before she quickly covered her mouth.

"Wait a minute...," said Vanellope, "This is about Billy, isn't it?"

"No! I just... Shut up!" shouted Taffyta as he cheeks blushed a bright red.

It all was beginning to make sense now. The way she got angry at Billy for helping her instead of Taffyta at team battle, why she didn't join the sleep over last night, why she's acting out over skiing...

"Oh my gobstopper!" snickered Vanellope before she went into smug mode, "You like Billy, don't you?"

"What? No I don't!" Taffyta pouted.

"Yes you do!"

"No I don't!"

"You loooooove him!" teased Vanellope.

"Stop it!" shouted Taffyta.

"LOOOOOOVE!" teased Vanellope loudly.

"Okay, fine! I like him! A little," admitted Taffyta, "I've just been so jealous of him spending so much time with you."

"I just have one question," said Vanellope.

"What is it?" asked Taffyta.

"WHY?!" asked Vanellope in bewilderment, "No offense, but Billy's a total nougat brain and you're... well, you're Taffyta. I'd think a pretty boy like Rancis would be more your type."

"Well, I'm not the same Taffyta you know," said Taffyta.

"You don't even have to worry because I don't even like Billy in that way," said Vanellope, "We're just friends. Besides, he has cooties and a stupid looking haircut. What do you see in him, anyway?"

"There's just something about him that gives me... a Sugar Rush!" said Taffyta excitedly.

"A title drop? Really?" asked Vanellope dryly.

"That and I think him saving my life may have something to do with it," said Taffyta.

"This I gotta hear," said Vanellope.

"It kinda started when I was first unlocked," said Taffyta, "I was wandering around Sugar Cane Forest and I stepped on a double striped log. Since I was just unlocked, it was like being plugged in for the first time so I didn't know..."

"So you didn't know double stripes broke," said Vanellope, "Guh doy!"

**Flashback**

_I fell into a pit of Nesquik-sand and because everyone else was racing, nobody knew where I was. I was already up to my chin in the stuff..._

"HELP! SOMEBODY HELP ME!" sobbed Taffyta as the mascara on her face was running. the chocolate milk mix was slowly creeping all the way to her chin, "I DON'T WANNA DIE!"

_Lucky for me, somebody heard my cries and that somebody was Butterfinger Billy._

Out of nowhere, Billy was swinging on a Laffy Taffy vine while doing the Tarzan yell. He swung by, quickly pulled Taffyta from out of the Nesquik-sand, and they both land safely on a nearby sugar cane tree.

_It wasn't exactly the most graceful of rescues, but I was appreciative nonetheless._

Unfortunately, Billy was standing on a double stripe branch and he plummets into the Nesquik-sand pit.

"I'm okay!" shouted Billy from below, "The Nesquik-sand broke my fall!"

Taffyta sighs, grabs a Laffy Taffy vine, and swings down to get him.

_And ever since he saved my life(in addition to saving his), we became very close friends from then on. _

**End Flashback**

"And over time, I developed a crush on him," said Taffyta.

"And you haven't told him because...?" asked Vanellope.

"Because what if he doesn't like me back?" asked Taffyta.

"What's not to like about you? You're pretty, you're a good racer, you're..." paused Vanellope as she was trying to think of more ways to compliment Taffyta. She wasn't exactly the kindest racer. Or the most modest. Or the most caring. She was always so... Taffyta-y.

"Well, you're pretty!" finished Vanellope.

"Maybe I should just forget it," sighed Taffyta as she slumped down on the bench, "Especially after the way he yelled at me."

"Listen, I think I can help you," said Vanellope, "I'll try nudging the nougat brain in your direction and we'll see what happens from there."

"You'd do that for me?" asked Taffyta, "Even after the way I treated you?"

"Why not?" asked Vanellope, "What better punishment for that nitwix than hooking him up with you?"

"Oh, thank you! Listen. I'm... I'm sorry I called you the 'g word' back there," said Taffyta ashamedly, "I was just so angry and jealous."

"Eh, that's all chocolate milk under the bridge," said Vanellope.

A few moments later, Billy came back holding a pizza box under his arm.

"Looks like you two are getting along," said Billy, "Anyway, look what I snagged from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle video game in Dos-Box. I got rid of the olives because I know how much you don't like olives, Taffyta."

"Thanks, Billy," said Taffyta.

"Listen, I'm sorry about that Lady Straw-Ga crack back there," apologized Billy as he rubbed the back of his neck.

"And I'm sorry, too," said Taffyta, "I didn't bring my kart here so, um, do you think one of you can give me a lift?"

"Sorry, Taffyta, but my kart's kinda full," said Vanellope, "Guess you'll have to ride with Billy."

"I guess you're riding with me then," chuckled Billy.

"Heh, yeah," chuckled Taffyta, "I guess I am."

A little later, after returning to the Wii's memory units, the racers were watching MVP Baseball 2005 on TV, while having a rather interesting conversation.

"200 Big Macs," said Ruth.

"Nope," said Carl.

"500 Quarter Pounders?" asked Candlehead.

"Nah ah," Carl shook his head.

"1 Arch Deluxe," said Snowanna.

"No," said Carl.

"C'mon, not even that?" asked Ruth.

"Not even that," said Carl.

"Than what can kill him?" asked Rancis.

"I've told you. Nothing!" said Carl, "Nothing can kill the Grimace!"

Meanwhile, Vanellope was sitting on a jellybean bag chair feeling homesick. Billy and Taffyta walked into the living room, and noticed Vanellope's sadness.

"Why so glum, chum?" asked Billy.

"I'm just feeling homesick," said Vanellope "I mean, your home is nice and all, but I just miss all my friends at the arcade so badly. I miss all of my friends in Sugar Rush. I mean you guys are great, but it's just not quite the same. I miss Sergeant Calhoun and her tough as nails attitude and her really big guns. I miss Felix and his old world charm. But most of all, I miss my stinkbrain Ralph.

"Wait, Ralph?" asked Taffyta, "As in Wreck-It Ralph?"

Vanellope nodded. Taffyta then began whispering something into Billy's ear.

"You sure about this?" asked Billy as Taffyta simply nodded, "Okay... Vanellope, follow me."

"Where are we going?" asked Vanellope as she got up.

"You'll see," said Billy.

He lead out to the Wii Home Hall until coming to an elevator labeled "Virtual Console". After entering and exiting, they found themselves inside a game that took place in a vast jungle.

"Okay, Now where are we?" asked Vanellope, "What game is this?"

"I wasn't sure if I could bring you here, but you seem pretty sad and we thought this might cheer you up," said Billy, "This is Wreck-It Ralph Nation."

Vanellope's jaw dropped. Was this really a Wreck-It Ralph game. Before she could process what was going on, a familiar large armed figure swung down the trees and landed in front of Billy and Vanellope, greeting them by beating his chest and yelling.

"Hey, Billy," greeted Ralph, "What brings you here?"

It was really him! The wild red hair, the orange plaid shirt, the overalls, the bad odor! It was stinkbrain!

"Ralph!" she said excitedly as he hugged him, "I missed you so much!"

"Vanellope?" asked Ralph, "How could you miss me already? You were just behind me."

"Wait, what?" asked Vanellope.

Landing besides Ralph was... Vanellope? Yes, it was her, but she wore a red hoodie instead of teal, her skirt was a normal skirt instead of peanut butter cup wrappers, and she had no candy decorations in her hair.

"Hey stinkbrain, I told you to wait-" said the other Vanellope before she got a good look at her teal hoodied counterpart. They both just stared at each other in shock and silence for a good 5 seconds.

"OH. MY. GOBSTOPPER." they both said in unison.

**End Chapter**

* * *

_Possible Voices:_

_Norton: Christopher Lloyd_

_Sarah: Jenette McCurdy_


	5. Wreck-It Ralph Nation

**Chapter 5: Wreck-It Ralph Nation: Vanellope's Wreck Quest**

_**A/N: Sorry about the delay on this chapter. I've just been kinda depressed this past week, but I think I'm a litte better now.**_

Vanellope still couldn't believe what she was seeing. It was like looking in a mirror... if the mirror's tint function was broken. She tilted her head to the side? So did the other Vanellope. She lifted her arm? So did she. She jumped? _She_ jumped. She made faces? _She_ made faces.

"Alright! What the Red Hots is going on here?" asked Vanellope.

"I should ask you the same question," said the other Vanellope.

"Crabapples on a stick... I knew this was gonna happen," muttered Billy, "At least the universe didn't implode upon itself..."

"Care to explain, nougat brain?" asked Vanellope.

"Vanellope meet Vanellope," said Billy, "Vanellope, Vanellope."

"Okay, now try explaining again," said Vanellope, "This time, using an actual explanation."

"I've been explaining nearly everything to you since you've gotten here," said Billy, "So forgive me for feeling a little 'explained out'."

"I'm Vanellope Von Schweetz," said the Vanellope in red.

"No, _I'm_ Vanellope Von Schweetz!" said Vanellope.

"No you're not! I am!" said the red clad Vanellope.

"No you're not! You're just copying me!" accused Vanellope.

"You're just copying me!" mimicked red Vanellope.

"Wait a minute? Are you mimicking me?"

"Are you mimicking me?"

"Stop it!"

"Stop it!"

"That's just annoying!"

"That's just annoying!"

"I've heard of stereo but this is a bit much, wouldn't you agree?" asked Billy.

"Alright, that's enough," said Ralph as he finally intervened and grabbed both Vanellopes by their hoodies.

"She started it!" they both shouted as they pointed to each other.

"It's obvious... you're _both_ Vanellope," said Ralph.

"Except I'm better," said red Vanellope proudly as she stuck her tongue out at Vanellope.

"Okay, why am I- I mean she is in this game?" asked Vanellope.

"She's my sidekick," said Ralph as he set both girls down.

"That can't be right," said Vanellope, "I'm from Sugar Rush, guh doy!"

"Well this game came _after_ Sugar Rush on the Nintendo 64," said Ralph, "Your character was pretty popular."

"Popular enough to be put in this game as a sidekick," said red Vanellope, "I think they call it transplanting."

"Hey, and I'm friends with the original Wreck-It Ralph," said Vanellope, "Small world. So who's the good guy in this game?"

"I am," said Ralph proudly.

"That's pretty funny, stinkbrain," chuckled Vanellope, "Seriously, it's Fix-It Felix Jr., right?"

"Nope, I'm serious," said Ralph, "I'm the good guy in this game!"

"Really? Too bad Ralph doesn't know about this," said Vanellope, "And what about Fix It?"

"He's got his own game," said Ralph, "I'm sure you'll find out more about that later, but for now let's go over to my place."

A little later, the gang arrive at Ralph and Other Vanellope's treehouse home.

"So you guys live in a treehouse?" asked Vanellope.

"Well, it beats living in a dump," said Ralph.

"So what are doing on an island instead of Niceland?" asked Vanellope as she turned to her red counterpart, "And what are _you_ doing on an island instead of Sugar Rush?"

"Let's see if I can remember correctly from the instruction manual's backstory..." said Ralph as he thought to himself, "I was sleeping in the dump with my stump when I got mixed in with a pile of bricks and got put in a shipping crate. Then I fell out of a plane and now I live here on my island."

"And I was on my way to some ambassador business thingie with my mom and-" said Nation Vanellope before she was interrupted.

"Wait a minute... I have a mom?" asked Vanellope.

"Yeah... Queen Coco Von Schweetz? Guh doy!" said Nation Vanellope, "Anyway, we were on our way when we were attacked by pirates. They captured my mom but I got away. Then they almost captured me too, but then Ralph showed up and beat them all up! And now we're on an adventure to rescue my mom from the pirates!"

"A mom? Pirates?" Vanellope asked herself, "This place keeps getting weirder and weirder..."

Just then, a loud blast could be heard from the distance and out of nowhere, a cannonball broke through Ralph's treehouse, missing him by an inch.

"What was that?!" asked Vanellope.

"Redbeard...," Ralph growled.

Before Vanellope could ask, a loud gravely cackling could be heard from the horizon. As Ralph and the others looked out the window, they could see a pirate ship sailing on the ocean. And on that ship was a rather rotund man wearing a pirate captain's outfit. As his name implied, he had a beard or red hair that matched the hair on his head and an eyepatch covering where his left eye was. Also on the ship was Vanellope's mother, Coco Von Schweetz who greatly resembled an adult version of Vanellope, who was tied to ship's mast.

"You might as well surrender, you scurvy hillbilly!" shouted Redbeard in a gravely voice, "My Salty Dogs are all over the island and I have the Queen of the Sugar Rush Kingdom! It's only a matter of time before we find the treasure of the island! Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho!"

"NEVER!" shouted Ralph at the top of his lungs as he effortlessly punched away Redbeard's cannonball which narrowly missed his ship.

"Have it your way!" growled Redbeard, "When all is said and done, I'll make you all walk the plank!"

"CUTSCENE OVER! GAME STARTING!" boomed a disembodied voice.

"Game time! Let's go Vanellope!" said Ralph excitedly as he leapt through the newly formed hole that the cannonball left.

"Alright!" said Vanellope as she ran towards, but was stopped by her red clad counterpart.

"He was referring to me, faker," said Nation Vanellope as she leapt out the hole, "Besides, you don't have what it takes to take on Redbeard."

"I do too!" whined Vanellope as she followed her, "C'mon! Let me come with you guys!"

"No way, kid!" protested Ralph, "We're going to the last boss. There's a pretty good chance that you will die and when you die outside your game-"

"You die for real! I know, I know!" said Vanellope as she then got on her knees, "But she goes with you all the time and I'm so far away from home and... and I miss my Ralph so much. Please?"

Vanellope soon give him a puppy eyed looked and quivered her bottom lip. Ralph sighed heavily and wiped his large palm over his face. He was going to regret this...

"Fine, but you're sticking close to me until we reach the final boss." said Ralph, "And you cannot leave tag mode; You're invincible that way. Do not follow me over pits, you'll be levitated automatically when you're offscreen. And if I die, you have to switch with the other Vanellope _immediately_, got it?"

"Roger wilco, stinkbrain!" said Vanellope.

"This is a bad idea..." said Nation Vanellope in a sing songy voice.

"You guys go ahead and play hero," said Billy from the treehouse, "I'm just gonna stay here where it's safe."

"C'mon, Billy!" shouted Vanellope, "Where's your sense of adventure?"

"Yeah, I traded that for some common sense," said Billy, "Like I said, I'm gonna stay here where I- AHHHHHHHH!"

Billy was then scooped away by a pirate swinging on a vine, in mid sentence.

"That's not good," said Ralph, "Well, at least he screams like a damsel in distress."

"I better go save the nougat brain before he wets himself," said Vanellope.

"Yeah, you'd better get moving if you wanna rescue your boyfriend," teased Nation Vanellope.

"He's not my boyfriend," said Vanellope in a completely deadpan tone as she rolled her eyes, "My boyfriend would be way better looking... and taller."

"Like you could get someone better looking," scoffed Nation Vanellope.

"You do realize who you're insulting, don't you?" retorted Vanellope.

Realizing what Vanellope meant by that, Nation Vanellope hung her head in shame at the self insult.

"Enough chit chat! We gotta go NOW!" said Ralph as Vanellope followed suit.

"See you guys at the next checkpoint!" shouted Nation Vanellope from a distance.

"So where are we suppose to go?" asked Vanellope.

"We just have to get to that pirate ship," said Ralph pointing to a large ship in the middle of the ocean, "But we gotta get past Redbeard's Salty Dogs first."

The Salty Dogs were running towards Ralph and Vanellope. Much to Vanellope's surprise, the Salty Dogs were anthropomorphic dogs dressed up as pirates.

"Shiver me timbers!"

"We'll make ya walk the plank"

"Arrrr!"

"To Davy Jones with ya!"

"A-hyuk!"

"Just stay behind me, kid!" said Ralph as he began punching pirates left and right.

As Ralph was punching away all the baddies who seemed to just keep coming at him, Vanellope notices a bazooka lying around.

"Wonder what's this thing?" asked Vanellope as she picked it up.

"Careful with that!" warned Ralph.

Vanellope accidentally clicks on the trigger which releases a cluster of bricks from the bazooka which exploded into smaller bricks upon impact, blasting all the pirates to kingdom come.

"COOL!" shouted Vanellope happily.

"That's the brickzooka," said Ralph, "Packs a pretty mean punch."

"I'll say!" said Vanellope, "Exploding bricks! Best! Game! Ever!"

"Just don't get all trigger happy with it," said Ralph.

"Okay, we beat the pirates so now what?" asked Vanellope.

"We steal their cannon," said Ralph as they walked up to a cannon.

"Cool! We're gonna use a cannon! We're gonna use a cannon! Where gonna- Wait how's a cannon gonna get us to Redbeard's ship?"

"I'll show you," said Ralph as he grabbed Vanellope and hopped into the cannon.

A few seconds later, they blast into the sky in the direction of Redbeard's ship. Meanwhile on Redbeard's ship, Billy was tied to the mast along with Queen Coco Von Schweetz while Captain Redbeard was gloating.

"The Sugar Rush kingdom will pay handsomely for the safety of their queen," said Redbeard.

"You won't get away with this, Redbeard!" said Coco, "My daughter and Ralph will stop you!"

"That pipsqueak and that stinky hillbilly?" scoffed Redbeard, "Not a snowball's chance in Topeka! And as for YOU!" he continued, turning his attention to Billy while scratching his head in confusion, "I've never seen you before. Why did my pirates capture you, anyway?"

"Really bad AI?" asked Billy.

"Yeah, they are dumb as bricks aren't they?" said Redbeard, "Eh, no matter. I'm pretty sure I can use you as a cabin boy or something."

"I've only been tied to a mast for 20 minutes and I'm getting rope burns already," complained Billy.

"Try being tied to a mast for almost the entire game..." said Coco, "He doesn't even have the decency to use nylon rope..."

"Hey! Take it up with the programmers not me!" barked Redbeard.

At that moment, Ralph and Vanellope land onto the ship in front of Redbeard.

"Not so fast, Redbeard!" said Ralph, "Let the queen and the boy go!"

"Wreck-It Ralph... At last we meet," said Redbeard as he unsheathed his sword, "You've made it past my crew and my traps. It's almost a shame to destroy such a worthy adversary like you... almost."

"And it would almost be a shame to pound you into the ground," said Ralph, "...almost."

"Enough talk!" shouted Redbeard, "Let's end this once and for all!"

"Alright, it's time for you to tag out with the other Vanellope...," whispered Ralph.

"Okay, and how do I do that?" asked Vanellope.

"You just go to the big WR box over...," said Ralph as he was looking around, "Uh, Where's the buddy respawn box?"

"This is the final boss!" boasted Redbeard, "There ain't no buddy respawn! You die here, you have to beat me without taking a hit!"

"Uh oh..." panicked Ralph.

Redbeard then jumped onto the crow's nest as a barrage of cannonballs flew into the boss arena. Ralph and Vanellope narrowly avoided each and every one. Redbeard then fired a red cannonball that the two dodged that simply sat in the arena.

"That's weird. It's just sitting there," said Ralph.

"Punch it, Stinkbrain!" said Vanellope.

"What?"

"Punch it! It's red and glowing! Punch it!" said Vanellope.

Ralph punched it and sent it flying back into the crow's nest where it knocked Redbeard down. Vanellope then stomped on Redbeard's head and his healthbar began to lower.

"Hey, we found his weakness!" said Ralph, "We just have to do it 2 more times!"

"Let's see if you can dodge THIS?!" shouted Redbeard.

He then jumped back into the crow's nest and the cannonballs fired in a much faster manner and in a more unpredictable pattern. Ralph and Vanellope barely managed to avoid them until the red cannonball landed again. Ralph punches the cannonball back into Redbeard which knocks him out of the crow's nest once again. Vanellope stomps on his head, dropping his lifebar to only 1 hit point left. As Redbeard got back up, he was beginning to flash red.

"NOW YOU'VE DONE IT!" shouted Redbeard angrily, "PREPARE TO FACE MY WRATH!"

Redbeard angrily ran towards Ralph, wildly swinging his sword as cannons were firing from every direction. As Vanellope and Ralph were avoiding the cannonballs, this time they began making holes in the arena upon impact.

"This is getting harder!" said Vanellope as she dodged more cannonballs.

"Just a few more cannonballs and we're- WHOA" shouted Ralph before he was blown off the ship by a cannonball from nowhere.

"Ralph!" shouted Vanellope before she was pinned down by Redbeard with a knife near her throat.

"Any last words before I cut ya to ribbons?" asked Redbeard.

"Redbeard! NO!" shouted Nation Vanellope as she climbed onto the ship.

"What kind of trickery is this?" asked Redbeard in confusion, "Is the game glitching out?"

"SHE'S NOT FROM THIS GAME!" shouted Ralph from the ocean.

"She's what?!" asked Redbeard in shock as he stopped dead in his tracks.

He looks to see the red clad Vanellope was standing on the other side of the ship and turned back to see the Vanellope he had almost killed.

"OH! I'M HAVING A HEART ATTACK! BLEH!" shouted Redbeard as he fell over, clutching his chest.

The words "You Win" began flashing and the game was going into the ending credits.

"Good thing old Stinkbeard went into a heart attack," said Vanellope as she was suddenly being helped up by the auburn bearded pirate.

"I'm so so sorry, sweetheart!" said Captain Redbeard apologetically he was dusting her off, "I didn't know you weren't part of the game. Are you alright?"

"Are _you_ alright?" asked Vanellope confused.

"What? I could've really hurt you!" said Redbeard, "If you had died, you would've never regenerated ever again and I couldn't live with myself if something like that happened."

"Wait, I thought you were the bad guy in this game," said Vanellope.

"Hey, just because I'm a bad guy doesn't mean I'm a bad _guy_!" explained Redbeard.

"Yeah, Ol' Redbeard is really just a big ol' softie when the game's off!" said Nation Vanellope.

"What? Softie?! Why, I'm still the meanest toughest pirate in all the 7 seas!" boasted Redbeard.

"I hate to spoil this little lovefest between you, but you think can untie us first?" asked Billy.

"Right. Sorry," said Ralph as he untied Billy and Coco, "Vanellope, this is Queen Coco Von Schweetz."

"Nice to meet you, um... mom?" asked Vanellope confused.

"Likewise, kiddo," said Coco as she ruffled up the kid's hair.

"And you've already met Redbeard," said Ralph, "The _real_ Redbeard."

"Oh don't you go doing that whole 'soft' thing, too," said Redbeard, "As you saw, I wasn't going easy on you, even if you're my little brother."

"Wait, you're Ralph's brother?" asked Vanellope.

"Yep," said Redbeard, "It's revealed in the 100 percent ending."

"Wow, this is so awesome!" said Vanellope before she started feeling sad, "But it kinda makes me miss my Ralph again."

"I'm pretty sure your Ralph really misses you, too," said Nation Ralph as he gave the child a comforting hug, "Just hang in there, kid. Things are gonna be alright."

"Yeah, I'm sure things are gonna be fine," said Nation Vanellope.

"We should probably get going," said Billy.

"I guess I'll see you guys later?" asked Vanellope.

"Just hang in there, kiddo," said Redbeard, "Things'll get better. You'll see."

Billy and Vanellope then left Wreck-It Ralph Nation, returning back to the Wii Home Hall. Billy couldn't help but notice Vanellope was feeling down again, just like before they entered.

"I probably shouldn't have taken you there," said Billy.

"It's not your fault," said Vanellope, "It was nice to see Ralph again, but it just kinda made me miss him even more..."

"I'm sure wherever Ralph is, he's probably thinking of a way to find you..."

Meanwhile on the internet, Ralph's stomach was beginning to growl from hunger.

"I'm starving..." said Ralph, "We probably should've packed some food before our trip."

"I'm a bit peckish myself," said Felix.

As Calhoun looked down the road, she saw a sign that read "Games4free dot com featuring Diner Dash. Only 500mb away".

"Guess we can take a pitstop," said Calhoun, "We're ahead of schedule anyway."

The browser then continued down the road heading for the Diner Dash game at the Games4free website...

**End Chapter**

**Notes and Trivia:**

_**I was intending to include a "Wreck-It Rap" which would've been a parody/homage to Donkey Kong 64's Wreck-It Rap, but I couldn't think up lyrics to save my life.**_

_**Voice talents**_

_**Coco Von Schweetz: Grey Delisle**_

_**Captain Redbeard: Brian Doyle Murray**_


End file.
